TOPANGA SOCIAL CONNECTION

GUIDE TO YOUR PHONE DATE

The date and time are set…now what? Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered!

We set up old-school phone dates via a private conference line. You don't exchange last names or contact info, you just have a convo and be intentional about connecting. After the call, you both fill out a feedback form that is reviewed by one of our Dating Coaches and indicate whether you are interested in connecting again or not. If both are interested in connecting again, we exchange numbers and let the connection grow.

HOW TO GUARANTEE A GOOD DATE

Do everything in your power to make the other person feel comfortable, known, and valued regardless of their potential to be your soul mate.

HOW TO PREPARE

It’s important to have the mindset AND the right environment for a successful phone date.

Treat this like a real date!

Put yourself in the right mindset by creating an inviting environment for your phone date.

  • Make sure you give yourself enough time and space before the call to take a deep breath and pray.

  • Find a comfortable and private spot to have your call where there will be no distractions.

  • Make yourself a special beverage to sip while you’re talking.

  • Play some low feel-good music in the background.

  • If you’re prone to distraction, get yourself a doodle pad to keep your hands busy while you’re talking.

  • Put your phone on Do Not Disturb and don’t scroll during your call.

HOW TO START

Say hello. Acknowledge the awkwardness and laugh about it. Put the other person at ease by telling them how glad you are to have a chance to get to know them.

Icebreaker Questions

  • How was your day? What did you do?

  • Did you bring a drink? What is it?

  • How has your week been? What have been 1 or 2 highlights?

  • How nervous are you right now? Is there anything I can do to help make you more comfortable?

“The best way to make someone feel comfortable is to ask them what they need.”

WHAT SHOULD YOU TALK ABOUT?

Keep it light and fun. The goal is to make a connection, not decide if they’re your soul mate!

Potential Topics

Hobbies/Interests, Friends, Work, Pets, Favorite Things

Topics To Avoid

Dreams + Life Goals, Previous Relationships, Your Perceived Flaws, and Personal Theology/Ideology

Good Questions To Ask

  • What do you enjoy doing in your free time (hobbies/interests)?

  • Are you more of a book or movie/tv person? What is the last movie/book you saw/read? What did you think of it?

  • Who are your closest friends? How did you meet them?

  • How would they describe you?

  • What does a typical weekend look like for you?

  • What do you like about your job? What’s hard about it?

  • Listen with the intent to understand the other person fully, rather than listening to respond.

  • Active listening is being fully engaged while another person is talking to you.

  • Ask follow-up questions such as, "How did you feel?" or "What did you think?".

HOW TO END

Tell them you have to go, but you enjoyed spending time with them. Affirm them by sharing something you really appreciated learning about them.

Don’t say anything about potential next steps. Just say good-bye and let it ride.

WHAT HAPPENS AFTER THE DATE?

You will be emailed a feedback form to complete. Your Dating Coach will review the feedback and communicate any applicable next steps to both parties.